psych major by day pizza maker by night

Sitting with my female coworkers and wondering if they ever masturbate.

eatpussylivehappy:

I think you’re cute

cute as in I wanna hear what you sound like while experiencing an orgasm

chris evans with a beard is the type of guy to take you out drinking and take you home and fuck you until you cannot walk

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chris evans without a beard is the type of guy to bring you flowers and coffee before work and tell you a joke while making love

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Serenity - yes, it is. 
Jenny - yeah… To most people this seems normal but I’m so paranoid someone from school will tell on me.

Serenity - yes, it is.
Jenny - yeah… To most people this seems normal but I’m so paranoid someone from school will tell on me.

Well if the school found out I drank, smoked, had sex, etc I could be put in poor standing with the college and that would be bad.

Well if the school found out I drank, smoked, had sex, etc I could be put in poor standing with the college and that would be bad.

crashmypartyhard:

holyklainebowsbatman:

samwinchestears:

theblackship:

minseoktoe:

chii24:

THE SUN IS ON FIRE, I REPEAT, THE SUN IS ON FIRE.

#THE OCEAN IS FLOODING #I REPEAT #THE OCEAN IS FLOODING.

THIS IS AN EMERGENCY, THE EARTH IS SPINNING GUYS, IT’S FUCKING SPINNING!!

A MYSTERIOUS GAS HAS SETTLED ALL THROUGHOUT EARTH AND WE ARE CURRENTLY BREATHING IT IN

this site. seriously.

Yeah seriously wondering if I’m going to stay in good standing with the college. Need to keep my nose clean for three semesters.

I’ve been maintaining my weight for probably a year now, but it still feels weird to be this size. I can’t decide if it’s good weird or bad weird.
Body stuff just feels kinda odd right now.
I’m incredibly confident, but also cripplingly self conscious… I take too much of my confidence from other people’s willingness to talk to me, touch me, etc. there are parts of my body that I love and parts that I’m not sure how to accept and love unless someone tells me they like it, too.

cherryseltzer:

to all young tumblr people, i am old enough that my friends and peers are divorced, have children, are in AA, etc. and they all still watch ‘adventure time’ and take 100 selfies a day and overdraft their bank accounts and stuff. so don’t worry, you never have to grow up, you just get adult responsibilities heaped on top of your childish mess.

love, a 32 year old person who has $7 in her bank account and a new $6 pastel pink roll of duct tape.

6 am comes far too early every day.
Really hoping I get to sleep later than this in India.

illkim:

Guy: *during sex* Who’s your daddy??

Me: 

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thatblackveganguy:

I ate this for breakfast, because I could :)

Oh that’s beautiful.